Do You Want To Up Your Online Dating Game?
Online dating is a completely different minefield when it’s compared with ordinary dating. Its not only more convenient you also get the advantage of being able to take your time and think of a good response. It makes it easier to stop yourself from putting your foot in your mouth. You have the opportunity to say exactly what you want to, as opposed to nervously word vomiting. There’s less chance of you accidentally looking like a jerk when you are holding a conversation with a potential love interest.
However, just because there are many positives doesn’t mean there aren’t any negatives. One of those negatives is actually because you aren’t communicating in person. Its quite common for people to be more confident when they are safely behind a keyboard! Causing them to be more forward, which often results in negative behaviour. Another issue is the fact you can’t hear a person tone of voice. Things you say can be taken in the wrong context and showing you in a bad light.
For this article I asked multiple women whether they have ever received messages which they’d deem inappropriate or outright unacceptable. This concluded with every single one of them claiming that they had.
So guys, I don’t want any ifs ands or buts on this one. I myself am a female and although I cannot and would not talk for all of us I’d like to think I know a fair amount about what a woman wants. With all that in mind I have gathered a list of ‘don’ts’ which you can use when online dating. Hopefully helping you to not only have more success but also avoid causing any upset or jeopardising your future happiness.
First and foremost is sending messages with inappropriate content, especially to a complete stranger! This one I really cannot emphasise enough. Rude photographs and sexually explicit messages are entirely unacceptable guys. it’s inappropriate, derogatory and outright disgusting. Women don’t appreciate it, they just find it incredibly disrespectful and objectifying. Please let’s also remember the definition of sexual harassment
(Description from the online dictionary.)
harassment (typically of a woman) in a workplace, or other professional or social situation, involving the making of unwanted sexual advances or obscene remarks.
If you are both on the same page and want to be a little naughty then by all means get down and dirty. BUT do not do this without consent.
Be sensible when you are complimenting someone. Now I don’t want you to get confused on this one, compliments are great and I’m not telling you to avoid them, quite the opposite. There are however certain types of compliments that should probably be avoided. Put it this way you would get a better response if you compliment a lady on her eyes as appose to informing her she has “sexy boobs”. Make sense?
“Hi how are you?”
“Good thanks you?”
That says it all really doesn’t it? 2 messages each, 10 words and your conversation is as dry as a badgers asshole. You can do better I have faith in you.
Show your lovely face guys! If you don’t have photographs of you on your profile then you need to seriously consider uploading one. When your profile doesn’t have at least one photo woman will worry they we are talking to a potential creep at best, worst case scenario, an axe murderer hiding from the law. Let us see your beauty!
Try to make sure you’re competent with your spelling. I’m not saying proof read your messages multiple times it’s not an English exam. No, I don’t mean “wherefore art thou Romeo?” That’s a tad extreme. However, “yo u gd luv” isn’t going to do you any favours either..
Don’t be a spammer. When I say ‘spam’ I’m not referring to shoving advertisements down their throat. I mean, repeatedly sending them messages (especially if it’s the exact same message) over and over again! Hoping that you will eventually get a response. I’m sorry to say you won’t find yourself receiving the outcome you want. All it will do is come across as rude, intimidating and actually rather annoying.
The internet is full of singles looking to date if you don’t get the outcome you desire you can go on to find another user who ticks all of your boxes!
I know this may come across slightly ranting but trust me all I am doing is trying to help you be your best self when online dating!